Boyfriend took it for meeeeeehhhh :D
Maaf ya blog ini sempat berubah jadi tong sampah nggak penting. Sementara sisanya saya nggak ada waktu untuk update apa-apa, karena nggak ada yang penting juga. Tapi sekarang ada yang lumayan mau diceritakan. Siapa tau bisa menjadi inspirasi bagi teman-teman yang masih mengejar mimpi. ehem. you know who you are. hahaha.
So, as we all know, pertengahan Januari lalu saya memutuskan untuk resign dari kerjaan lama saya. Sebuah langkah lumayan berat, karena saya harus gambling habis-habisan. Keluar dari sebuah perusahaan media terbesar di Indonesia dengan starter gaji yang LUMAYAN BANGET. Alasannya? Simple kok. Ini bukan yang saya mau. Hal yang banyak sekali disayangkan orang-orang. Dan banyak yang mengajukan pertanyaan yang saya kurang suka, "Kenapa nggak minta pindah ke redaksi aja?" Man, you think I'm a fool? Kalau memang ada celah, untuk apa saya menunggu sampai 7 bulan dan sampai benar-benar muak? Padahal saya sedih lho meninggalkan teman-teman saya di kantor itu. Yang walaupun hanya 7 bulan, tapi semua baik-baik :) But, I have to. Karena lama-kelamaan masuk kantor makin terasa seperti mimpi buruk dan saya tahu ada hal yang saya cinta menunggu di luar sana.
Alhamdulillah, hanya seminggu menganggur saya diterima jadi editor online. Hahaha a 23 years old editor. Not bad lah yaa.. Lucunya, pekerjaan ini berawal dengan tidak baik. Setelah saya ngotot nggak mau ditempatkan di online lagi, kantor pun ngotot hanya ada posisi di online untuk saya. Akhirnya saya kalah dalam bargaining process dan dengan berat hati menerima kerjaan ini hanya atas nama saya nggak bisa nganggur lama-lama. Ditambah gaji saya turun dari LUMAYAN jadi UNDER LUMAYAN. Ditambah saya nggak terlalu nyambung sama lingkungannya yang g4oL 9e3Laaaa. Ditambah saya masih pengen jadi the real wartawan, wartawan politik, wartawan harian. Sampai masalah rute kendaraan ke kantor yang ribet and so on and so on yang kemudian membuat saya sempat menangis, beberapa hari sebelum mulai bekerja.
Begitu masuk....
Ternyata...
I've never been this happier. And this is what I really want. :)
Saya mendapat kesempatan meng-interview orang-orang yang saya kagumi, kenal langsung sama mereka. Setiap hari kerjaan saya ya menulis. Bebas. Apapun yang saya suka. Sebagai editor saya bahkan bisa menyalurkan keinginan-keinginan saya, konsep-konsep yang ada di kepala saya. Saya bisa nonton Java Jazz, Duncan Sheik, gratisan karena harus liputan. Saya ketemu wartawan-wartawan lain setiap media gathering. Saya ketemu banyak orang tanpa harus berjualan and pretending to be someone that i'm not. Saya nggak harus update score sepakbola terbaru and somehow that's such a big relief for myself. Ada kelegaan tersendiri lepas dari sesuatu yang saya bener-bener nggak suka. Nggak masalah pendapatan saya UNDER LUMAYAN, karena saya bisa masuk dan pulang kantor sesuka jiwa, stress-free kinda job. Semua teman-teman kantor seusia dan nggak ada satupun yang bossy, yang ada semua 'ngajak' biar kerjaan kita sebagai satu grup Natamedia sama-sama terlihat bagus dimata orang luar.
Pelan-pelan saya merasakan mimpi utama saya jadi jurnalis harian aka jurnalis koran terkikis dengan sendirinya, because I love my job too much. Memang nggak ada cerita nginep di kantor, fuck that, who wants to anyway? I don't live for work, I live for life itself. Memang saya nggak bisa wawancara tokoh-tokoh politik idola, ah interview seniman dan pengusaha cupcakes juga seru dan jauh dari menegangkan kok. Lagipula, teman-teman saya yang tau banyak soal politik juga belum tentu tau banyak tentang berita lifestyle yang saya tulis kok.
Jadi, tidak ada yang tidak bisa disyukuri dari hidup saya saat ini. Dan semakin menyadari ungkapan 'God knows best' itu memang benar adanya.
So, everything's been great :)
my small team at the Java Jazz Festival 2011. Did you see the ID? Yay! I'm a lifestyle journalist! ;)
First meal of 2011 : Macaroni Schotle. :)Plus, boyfriend said it was good. success! :D
one of my friend said, that I am scared of you. You know I bark like a dog, continuously. But you, you're as thin as paper and as fragile as a jar. And that's what makes me scared. If I'm mad at you, I'll roar but it'll gone in no time. Black and white is my emotion. But you, when you're mad. silent is all you have to give, and when you can't take it anymore, you say you're thought in a trembling voice. And when you're voice's trembling, I know you're mad. Mad as hell. And I am scared as fuck. Because only God knows what you'll do. Hiding in your cave until you're ready, or you just madly going through everything like there's nothing happen, but there's just anger inside.I can't go home early, my job's makes me even more busy than I've ever been. And I'm scared. I'm scared of what you'll do. Time... come on! I need more time!
Just a quick post because I cant barely stick my ass to this chair.. busy busy busy but I don't want to quit blogging. - Right after the new year party, I made my 2011 resolution come true. I cooked! A macaroni schotel. Never thought it's soooo easy to make. Well, my Mom said it tastes good. My boyfriend said it tastes good. My bestfriend said, there's too much onion. Too bad I loveeeeee onion too much to give up on this. But overall she said it's quite good. So, it's a success! Maybe I should try to cook at least once in a month. Yeah, right.- Moving out to BOLA section. For the last three months, I forced my ass to work as account executive in Bolanews.com. As a new and segmented media, it's quite hard to find a potential client. Beside, Indonesians still not fully aware about the advantages of online advertising. But, start from this year, I've been rolled to Tabloid BOLA. It's a new thing for me since I'm not a big footballers fan but I love this job because I get to be busy. But i'm sooo busy until I have to give up blogging. and I still don't know how to balancing my work, my hobby and my social life. I can barely look at my phone!damn! I have to go. I am not done yet... :((
I'm not really into resolution and never really made one. Simple, I thought not everything goes according to plan so I'd like to just go down with the flow. Well, I do have wishes but most of them are highly unreachable. I need God's hands to reach it. That's why I call them wishes. For me, resolutions are somethings you can afford, with all of your efforts. It's real, and it's reachable. But, that's just my stupid theory, as a dumb kid who just starts to see this world in a grown-up way.Well, this year's quite different. I plan on make some changing here and there in my life. Not really a big plan though, but one in a more realistic way. I plan to learn...... to cook. yeah, laugh as hard as you want. Grin as wide as you can. I know. I suck at cooking. Back when I still live alone in Bandung, I just cook instant meals when I want to eat something different. Yeah, noodles, porridge, chicken wings, chicken fillets, meatballs, etc etc. And that's, why, I've suffered lack of nutrition and couldn't got up from bed for 3 days.Eventhough you can't put my name and cooking in one sentence, I'd love to learn. For you who don't know me quite well, I love Rachel Ray and her cooking-talkshow tv show. Plus, I'm a sucker for Italian food, and Rachel Ray loves to make some. I Still remember how she make Gnocci and chicken fillet, processed it with bourbon and orange jam, and it looks yummy and so easy to make. Well, that's why I don't really like Indonesian cooking show because it seems hmm 'ribet' and too many spices involved while european and american cooking shows are interesting with their limited spice and clean cooking concept. Awesome.
Anyway, Rachel Ray inspired me to start to cook something. I know Italian food are so damn easy but it's a good way to start rather than doing nothing. the other problems, are time. I don't really have time to cook. I mean, I just go home once in a week and I cherished my morning moreee than anything. So if I really want to learn to cook, I have to wake up earlier. which is hard. But, being able to do something always take some effort and I still have Sunday to wake up at 12 o'clock.Indonesians food are too difficult for a dummy beginner like me. They'll have their time, later, I promise, when I'm a wife, I'd learn to cook some of it. It's a promise.Ah, I know many of you cook like you're born to do it, and you can say I am lame for making this my new year resolution. But, I am excited! :D. Happy almost new year everyone! And hope you'll make your resolutions come true!Happy Cooking! ;D
Coba ya di toko buku ada buku 'Tata Cara Menjalani Hidup Dengan Baik dan Benar'. Karena kadang gue suka heran kenapa pake cara A atau B, tetep aja kepentok kepentok kepentok kepentok. Contoh ya, ada satu temen gue yang tergila-gila sama rencana. She live based on plan. Mulai dari rencana anggaran per bulan sampai menata aspek-aspek non ril seperti 'kalo dia giniin gue, gue akan A. kalo dia gituin gue, gue akan B'. Ujung-ujungnya dia jadi diputer-puter sendiri sama rencananya itu. Maksain diri sendiri karena beberapa diantaranya dia sendiri nggak sanggup. Sedangkan gue, gue itu dari dulu dikenal banget sebagai orang yang 'gimana ntar'. Segala macem gue ceburin dulu, nggak gue pikir dari awal gimana kalo A, dan gimana kalo B. Nanti gue kapok sendiri, baru gue cari jalan lagi. Ya, bagi gue hidup itu dijalanin sih, bukan dipikirin. Ujung-ujungnya, giliran ada masalah, gue malah jadi nggak bisa nentuin apa yang baik buat diri gue sendiri. Apa untung ruginya kalo gue ngambil A, terus kalo ngambil B kira-kira bakal gimana. Ujung-ujungnya ya gue lagi yang bingung, gue sendiri nggak tau yang baik buat diri gue itu yang mana, yang kaya apa. Sebenernya yang baik itu yang kaya gimana?
Anyway, semua serba terakhir di minggu terakhir 2010 ini. Resolusi 2011, nggak muluk-muluk lah. Semoga semua jadi lebih baik aja. Capek gue, sumpah capek. (nah ngeri nih gue kalo minta gini malah dikasih kebalikannya :D ). But my life is a joke, others joking on me. Ya selama gue masih kuat sih, silahkan aja sih jerking on me, joking on me, etc. Silahkan. Berarti resolusi 2011 bukan supaya ini lebih baik, tapi supaya gue lebih sabar deh ngadepin orang-orang yang nggak menghargai gue dan pandangan-pandangan gue.
Good morning people. Still not satisfied doing bad things to me. Monggo, dilanjut.
Selamat sore semua. :) (saah berasa banyak yang baca)Kembali ke halaman blogspot saya yang semakin lama semakin terasa seperti trashspot. Karena seperti biasa, hari ini saya mau menyampah dan mengeluh. Saya selalu salut lho sama orang yang jarang mengeluh, seperti my bestfriend, Ben. Orang yang paling sering mengomeli saya karena saya manusia dengan segudang keluhan (yeah, try my life, you jackass). But in my defense, mengeluh itu melepaskan sedikit stress, mengeluh itu ajang sharing dengan orang-orang terdekat dan mengeluh itu menyehatkan karena mengurangi tumpukan pikiran di otak. Hahaha iya, pembenaran. Dengan catatan, mengeluhnya bukan tidak diimbangi dengan tindakan ya. Misalnya mengeluh tentang 'kenapa rambut gue kusut', ya sah sah saja mengeluh selama si pemilik rambut kusut tetap giat perawatan rambut di salon dan beli produk-produk penghalus rambut. Sekedar contoh, tapi kok melebar kemana-mana ya? Hahaha. Lagi-lagi, itu teori saya sendiri.Berawal dari niat saya mengikuti semacam creative competition, dimana hal ini mengharuskan saya membuat satu makalah antara 3000-5000 kata. Sedih, sumpah sedih rasanya, ketika saya sadar otak saya sudah tidak terbiasa membuatnya. Dulu, membuat kerangka pemikiran terstruktur itu habis dalam beberapa menit saja, baru kemudian masuk tahap revisi. Sekarang saya hanya duduk terpaku di hadapan kertas kosong, dengan judul di atasnya, tapi tanpa butir-butir penjelasan di bawahnya. Oke, saya mau menulis tentang A, saya tahu bagian pertama itu harus membahas A itu apa. Kemudian Kenapa A itu jadi masalah. Apa relevansi A dengan topik yang ditentukan and so on and so on. Boook, bikin gitu doang gue bengong seada-adanya. *sigh* Impian kembali terusik, bagaimana caranya menjadi pintar, melatih otak dan bakat tanpa harus keluar uang untuk les, kalau memungkinkan malah dibayar. Ini yang kemudian menuntun pada kekecewaan berikutnya.Ya, sore ini saya ada janji. Terpaksa saya batalkan karena keadaan tidak memungkinkan. Sama sekali tidak menyalahkan siapa-siapa karena saya sadar ini sudah resiko dan kita memang memiliki tanggung jawab. Tapi kok ternyata saya kecewa ya? Saya selalu memegang teguh prinsip "whatever will be, will be". Dengan kata lain, yang sudah jodoh tidak akan kemana, dan ini berlaku untuk pria, pekerjaan, bahkan barang. what meant to be, will be. Saya masih mengharap telepon saya berbunyi dengan reschedule untuk pertemuan berikutnya. Sayangnya tidak. Lagi-lagi saya terima saja karena siapa saya dibandingkan dengan ribuan pesaing lainnya yang mungkin lebih kompeten? Dua kali saya melewatkan kesempatan serupa dengan alasan yang sama, saya tidak bisa meninggalkan tanggung jawab saya. Tapi rasanya... sedih... bahkan lebih parah ketimbang ditinggal pacar. Ya, saya lebih takut tidak bisa mencapai mimpi daripada ditinggal pacar, meskipun alhamdulillah sampai detik ini pacar masih ada. hahaha.Sedih karena, saya melewatkan satu hal yang benar-benar saya inginkan. Melewatkan satu hal yang menurut orang lain mungkin hal sepele, tidak penting, atau malah tolol, tapi menurut saya penting. Melewatkan satu hal yang mungkin akan menjadi langkah pertama saya mengejar mimpi. Saya bilang 'mungkin' karena saya bahkan tidak diberi kesempatan 'mencoba'. Iya, sedih lho. Apalagi hari ini saya sudah dressed up, tapi ternyata tidak bisa. Ya lebih dari sekedar itu, tapi itu cuma untuk nambah-nambahin biar makin sedih aja hahahaha zzzzzzzzzzzz. Sudahlah, saya tidak akan menyalahkan siapapun karena memang tak semuanya mengerti.Saya tidak ingin, menjadi tua dan hanya menjadi penulis blog.
Dan usia itu momok.
it's funny how this feeling brought me spiraling from the lowest point to the highest point in just within 3 days. :))I'm happy. really. :)
Promise, it's the last post for today. cukup dengan galau-galau keparat ini. Anyway, bener juga kata Tara, sebelum masa kejayaan Twitter, jarang sekali mendengar kata GALAU dan kata ini sekarang benar-benar populer. Padahal, jujur saya masih geli mendengar kata itu diucapkan. Sama seperti saya geli mengucapkan kata 'unyu'. Bukan karena norak. Ya, bagi seorang penulis (hahaha bohong besar) tidak ada kata yang norak. Tapi mengucapkannya itu aneh, seperti dramatisasi suatu suasana. Hahaha. Apa coba maksudnya.
Anyway, detik ini saya sedang bersyukur. Lucu, karena sebenarnya saya sedang tidak stabil, tapi saya masih sanggup bersyukur. Sebenarnya, sejak Sabtu malam kemarin, saya sedang tidak mood berbicara dengan siapapun. Apalagi Minggu paginya saya menelepon sahabat saya berjam-jam dan biasanya setelah sesi panjang curanmor (curhat in the morning) seperti itu, saya capek. Capek ngomong dan capek mikir lalu lebih memilih diam.
Lucunya, sejak Sabtu malam itupun saya tidak bisa diam karena otak saya seperti dipaksa bekerja membantu sahabat-sahabat saya memecahkan masalah mereka. Saya dipaksa mendengar dan membantu memberi solusi, ketika sesungguhnya saat ini saya juga sedang butuh dibantu. Yang satu datang dengan masalah pacarnya yang terlihat kurang serius, yang satu pusing urusan sekolah dan pacarnya yang memilih perempuan lain, satunya lagi mengeluh hidupnya tidak maju-maju dan laki-laki yang sedang dia suka, kemudian datang yang lain mengeluh mantan pacarnya yang masih dicinta menjelek-jelekkan dia dimana-mana, terakhir ada yang datang tersedu-sedu karena orangtuanya memaksanya menikah dengan pria pilihan si orangtua sementara sayangnya cuma untuk si mantan pacar yang kalau bareng malah berantem terus (shit. girls today, hidup memang didominasi pria dan cinta ya?).
Biasanya kalau sudah begini saya pakai teknik "sorry tadi gue udah tidur", "sorry gue lagi sibuk, nanti ya" atau "sorry bbm gue tadi error". HAHAHA. Thanks to technology for adding more variations to my bullshits. Anehnya, kali ini dengan sabar saya mendengarkan satu per satu mereka bercerita. Ikut mikir. Memberikan mereka support dan solusi yang kira-kira memungkinkan. Mendorong dengan semangat ketika sebenarnya disini saya juga sedang wirid al-ikhlas dan baca istighfar sebanyak mungkin. Ya, anehnya, kali ini saya bersyukur. Bersyukur bahwa saya masih berguna untuk orang lain meskipun hanya memberikan kontribusi seujung kuku. Bersyukur mereka masih mengingat saya meskipun mostly ketika mereka sedang ingin bercerita tentang seusuatu. Berarti saya sukses menjadi pendengar yang baik, dan secara tidak sadar saya berbuat sedikit kebaikan untuk orang lain. Menyisakan ruang di hati mereka untuk mengingat saya.
Akhirnya, hari ini berakhir lumayan baik dan saya harus mempersiapkan diri menyambut pagi hari esok dimana saya pasti terbangun dengan perasaan luar biasa tidak enak dan harus berjuang mengatasinya sampai semua membaik di siang hari. bisa nggak ya? PASTI BISA! :)
Once, I tweeted this 'the best revenge is to look good and be smarter than before', and some women retweeted it because they thought 'hey, it's so me!'But hey, sorry girls, or women, I was completely wrong and I was completely out of my mind. What's the point in looking good and being smarter, if they're just to attract his attention again, or to break his heart, or to make him realize that you're waaaayyy better than any other girl he's ever dated. Him... him.. him... It means you're still doing it for him. And you give him a privilege of knowing that you're still care. That's why you do all those stupid acts to attract him.Now I've realized, the best revenge is to really moving on. delete, delete, delete. categorized them as your past. meet some new friends and make love to someone new, without having to push it too hard. It is the best way. And who says you can't be sure about it? you can! Your heart contains the same substance exist in your mind, it was made from the same factory, only that your heart has the most fragile material, when your mind has the most powerful material. You won’t let weaknesses beat you, will you?Someone said this in a note,In terms of feeling, there is only black or white, and no such thing is in between. So, when you start to make all those groundbreaking efforts to make that person fall in love with you, that’s the moment when you will soon fail. If they don't fight you today, they are not the person for you tomorrow, next week, or even in the next 15 years despite of anything you wear, or anything you can say and give to them.When you put logic into your sense of likeliness to someone, you’ll have the power trip any love life can never provide. You will realize, how easy it is to love someone who’s already in love with you, you will embrace how amazing it is not being the one who’s trying too hard all the time, and most of all, you are happy for the things that you already have in your life.Love who you are, and love those, whom deserve the best inside of you, not those pricks who bring out the awkward-melancholic bastard in you. When one is not that into you, do leave them, depart, MOVE ON; and don't spare the attention, it’s their lost, and it’s your victory.One day in the near future, I promise you, they will look at you from far and see the real, dazzling, shimmering you, not long after your “departure” from their lives.And you will. You know you will.
Dear Tio temennya Wita, sekalian diiklanin nih produknya. :pSo, I ordered this "I Am Fucking Magical" tote bag, which I am (HAHAHA, yeah right), yesterday and now I'm waiting for this bag to be delivered to my house. I love the fox, the button-eyes and especially the tagline. They came in six different designs and all of them are cute, and they have two sizes of choice. This is the big one, and the other in slightly smaller size. All in affordable price range. You can have the small one for only IDR 30 k. delicious!Anyway, I've received the green owl t-shirt today and totally love it! ahh man, the magic of buying things online. you're just one click away. :D
anyway for Tio's other artworks and amazing designs (from what I heard, he's the official designer for Mocca's merchandise), you can just click here
I AM SOOOO CANNOT WAIT TO LAY MY HANDS ON THIS BOOK!!!
I've told everyone before that I am not really into a foreign chicklit because somehow they're a bit more shallow than ours. What they talk about are guys, sex, guys, sex and it goes on and on until you get boring. If, they turn it into a romantic comedy movie, then it usually be more 'awwww', cuteness. But to read it, it's a complete boredom.
But not with the shopaholic series. I didn't really like the first novel because yeah it was still a complete boredom. A twenty something woman deal with a credit card chaos and then she meets a perfect man and so on and so on and so on (but love the movie anyway). And I remember it clearly like it was yesterday, why then I bought the second book. It's just because I'm bored, I want to read something, but I don't have an idea what a good book to buy. So then I bought 'Shopaholic in Manhattan'. By the time I bought it, they've been releasing 5 books and I just hit the second. Out of my expectation, it was a hilarious book! Once I read it, I can not put it down. So then I bought all four of them right away. Yeah, as a college student, I spend all my money in one blow to get all four of them.
Rebecca Bloomwood not just a woman. But she is the extraordinary one who could think creatively and create a huge jokes in her own life. And I watched her grow from a slob into a smart mother in Shopaholic and Baby. Actually, it disappoint me when I found out that Shopaholic and Baby might be the end of a Shopaholic Series. I've bought other books wrote by Sophie Kinsella eversince but none of them are this great. Until, I found out that Mini Shopaholic now hit the store! Now I get to read how Minnie Brandon doesn't have even the slightest resemblance of her mother and it pissing Becky off. I truly can't wait!!
The bad news is, I've read all of them in Bahasa so I have to buy the latest edition in Bahasa too. It's my own regulation. So, I have to wait a little bit longer to read the translated edition! hope it's not too long then! :D
Wishing we could choose,Our own landscape..Wishing me and you,Could just go anywhere we wanted.Once in a blue moon,We'd stay out late...And watched the sun come up,at 5.30 in the morning.-- Lighthouse Family :)
Anderson Cooper. CNN Networks. Need I say more?And FYI, he was there when a genocide took place at Rwanda, killing 800.000 people within 100 days. Yes, he was there. Full media access from CNN allowed him to go around Rwanda along with military squad of the government. And that silver hair? Shows that he is friggin' smart and yes he is friggin' smart. yumm!
Terima Kasih ya untuk inspirasinya,
si pemberi gelang merah,
laki-lakiku yang tampan. :)
22 halaman lohhh! :D
But, no spoiler unfortunately. :))
Nggak mau ngasih bocoran ah.
22 halaman word itu kayanya dikit ya? Coba baca buku, buka sampai halaman 22 pasti masih tipis banget, tapi nulisnya setengah idup lho. Menurunkan scene-by-scene dalam kepala ke dalam lembaran kertas itu ternyata nggak gampang. Ini aja masih merasa kurang detail. :(
Belum lagi nunggu dan nyari inspirasinya. Ah, sebagai pembenci tekhnologi, I thank Bill Gates for Microsoft Word. Kebayang kalo harus tulis tangan kaya William Shakespeare. Bisa gila gua.
Hmm.. bocoran deh sedikit... Nanti malam kita jalan-jalan ke Bandung, inspired by perjalanan semalam Bandung-Jakarta kemarin. Udah, sekian bocorannya. :))
Dilihat-lihat ya, makin kesini blog ini makin menyedihkan lho.
Sepertinya sekarang cuma jadi tempat sampah sekaligus wadah (buaelaaahh wadah) berkomunikasi kita berdua, si makin cinta ketika jarak memisahkan. :))
Within months, kayanya I will definitely shut this down temporarily, sorting the proper posts, baru deh dibuka lagi biar temen-temen bisa baca. (temen-temen? temen-temen sape? temen-temen ghuehh? salah temen-temen ghuehh?? Basi! Madingnya udah mau terbit! *lho*?)
Despite the fact that we are the living prototypes of Def Leppard's song "When Love and Hate Collides", I still need you....
To untie this armlace. :))
Seriously, I have no idea how to tie and untie this thing,
which then resulted I have to take it along when I took a shower,
and... it lost its touch of red, sadly :(
I have a surprise for you, anyway.
See you!! ;P
emang anjing lo.pardon my french tapi ini lapak pribadi dan terserah gue mau ngomong apa.
You know what hope is?
Hope,
is a Bastard,
a liar,
a cheat,
and a tease.

Class of 2005, see you next week! :D
Man,
I
Will
Definitely
Kill
You.
I Will.